NaPoWriMo 2011 Done!

30 poems in 30 days done! I am clearly exhausted. In terms of my personal goals, I have done two translations (one from Bangla, one from French), have written two myth poems (one South Asian, one from Grimms' Brothers), I could write only three poems in forms, and I didn't get to do any historical research for any of my poems. I am forgiving myself, because during this entire month, I was also stressing over my Fall funding, and finishing the third chapter of my dissertation. I have tried to stick to a specific topic, even when I wrote the myth-poems. So, I am hoping, I have at least a chapbook worth of poems from this month-long exercise.

I want to devote the month of May to some revisions, and trying to figure out the shape of the manuscript. My gut sense is that, what I have here will make a decent chapbook. It might be a little too monotonous to think of a book from the material I have, but I will see. I am planning to assemble 32 pages worth of material from here. But then again, I have barely written down the poems in my notebook. I will have to see how they look as more finished, final products.

Now, what I have learnt from doing this:

a. I can write everyday. I can write 30 poems in 30 days.

b. I like the discipline of writing everyday, although I must confess, it's hard to take a second look at some of the poems.

c. I now have a body of work, which was created without the kind of inhibition that comes with trying new material. ( There wasn't much time to feel inhibited.)

d. There is a kind of peace in knowing that I cannot really push a specific topic beyond this point right now.

Now, I will congratulate myself a little bit and reward myself by having a kulfi. Tomorrow is a new day, and a new month!

Incoherent Reflections

Yesterday was a day just like others. I finally got to know I won't starve in Fall, I will have employment. And I can't help feeling grateful. Now, I just need to plough through the dissertation, and get it done. The last month has been very stressful in so many ways, not the least of which is the uncertainty over funding. Now, I can relax a little bit and actually get down to the work.

To keep myself distracted from these worries, I have been thinking about cover-art for poetry books a lot. I tend to think, the cover-art is a form of collaboration, a collaboration between the artist and the poet. Anyways, this is one of my favorite cover-arts in poetry books. The one above. I love the blue. I love the combination of the blue and the white. And I also love how the entire cover gives out the story of the verse-novel itself, in a very dexterous nutshell. What is more, I read somewhere, the poet Thylias Moss herself, designed it! I don't think I can ever be that talented, that multi-dimensional to try my hand in so many different things!

Writing A Poem

Writing a poem is not like buying anything. Writing a poem is not like shifting through seeds. Writing a poem is not like cooking rice. Writing a poem is not anything else I do. Must we have metaphors for everything? Writing a poem is a metaphor in itself.

Where I Stand So Far?

So, even when I was trying to finish the third chapter of my diss, I did not stop writing the poem for the day. There were days when I felt like I am dying, there were days when I felt numb, and then there were times when I just felt too dry to produce anything halfway sensible on page, let alone a poem. But I pushed myself, looked at unlikely places for inspiration, and I am learning a few things about the process:

1. Because I feel so robbed out of ideas, I am trying to look for ideas in places where I wouldn't normally go. Like, another poet's poem. Word lists. This looking for ideas in different places does make space for unlikely ideas. Things that would normally escape my attention are beginning to attract my attention.

2. I had decided, along with writing 30 poems in a month, I will also write on a particular topic. I am not disclosing the topic here right now, but again because I am running so low on ideas, I am having to approach my topic in slant. Which means, I am often writing from shifting POVs, expressing emotions I wouldn't necessarily go near because that's not my comfort-zone. So, yes, writing 30 poems in 30 days is making me push my comfort-zone quite a bit. Apart from making me dig deeper.

3. I am learning to see art as more than occasional creativity. This whole process is teaching me how much I love writing. It is teaching me, how only writing can generate ideas for writing and writing further. In other words, consistent work produces inspiration, rather than the other way round.

Halfway Through

I have written 15 poems so far. I missed yesterday, but then wrote two today. There was a point when I had felt extremely "dry" inside. Didn't have a word, image, sentence, theme or idea propping up. What helped was reading other poets' work, using their work as a springboard. The other challenge was, I did this along with drafting the chapter 3 of my dissertation. So, by the time I would come to the poem, I would feel extremely word-drained. Literally. There too, reading other poems helped! Most of the poems I have written so far, other than one, are free-verses. Now, I am thinking of giving a little bit more structure to the work ahead:

1. two translations
2. one from a "Western" myth/fairy/folktale
3. one from an Indian/South Asian myth/fairy/folktale
4. five in traditional forms
5. a persona poem in the voice of a character I find out through historical research

But I have learnt a lot in the past couple of weeks. Knowing that I will have to go back to the writing-table, gave me something to look forward to.

One of My Favorites From Domestic Work

Drapery Factory, Gulfport, Mississippi, 1956

She made the trip daily, though
later she would not remember
how far to tell the grandchildren--
Better that way. She could keep those miles
a secret, and her black face
and black hands, and the pink bottoms
of her black feet a minor inconvenience.


She does remember the men
she worked for, and that often
she sat side by side
with white women, all of them
bent over, pushing into the hum
of the machines, their right calves
tensed against the pedals.


Her lips tighten speaking
of quitting time when
the colored women filed out slowly
to have their purses checked,
the insides laid open and exposed
by the boss's hand.


when she recalls the soiled Kotex
she saved, stuffed into hag
in her purse, and Adam's look
on one white man's face, his hand
deep in knowledge.

Natasha Trethewey

Writing Poems Everyday

So far I have succeeded to produce a poem a day. Yes, it's a struggle. Like last night I felt like giving up, felt dry, no words or ideas coming to me. But then, I did anyway. I struggled with every word, particularly because I was so tired, and felt so drained. But then, as I said, I plowed on. I reminded myself, it's a challenge I have taken up with myself and I can't give it up at this stage. I reminded myself, even if I write a bad poem, it's still going to be a poem, and I can probably use a word, an idea from it later on. It worked. I haven't dared to look at the poem I wrote yet. But it's a poem! The thing is, I already have ten poems worth working on! I will have the subsequent months to revise them, to give them more shape, to go to places where I didn't dare to in the first draft--all these things that I tend to do while I revise. But at this point, I have 10 new poems, and it already seems like a lot!